DYNAMICS OF RELATIONSHIPS

.....chale the dynamics of relationships have changed paa oo....from pick up lines to dating to etc...some guy sees you on the #street and right there in the hot sun asks you if you dont want to marry him!..a guy stopped me whilst I was #speedwalking the other night and asked for directions to a church in the area.though I didnt know the church I tried to be helpful and the guy said I must be a Christian cos I was so nice to him!..what a laugh! the next thing he invites me to visit the same church he was asking directions to!it was just a pick up line!.he knew where the church was all along!...using Christianity by men to control,suppress and deceive women in the name of relationship is the order of the day!..people have all kinds of titles for dating nowadays...fuckbuddies,friends-with-benefits, sex mate,etc....
    People can be in a relationship for ten yrs or more doing everything (having kids,co-habiting,etc)and still call it 'dating'...people dont want to wear the boyfriend 'title' or 'cap' but want to enjoy all the #perks that come with it..they want to keep one window open and one leg out the door waiting for 'the one'..they say we are just 'kicking it' but we will have unprotected sex and you can't see any other guy apart from him.so Wat If u get pregnant wat will u do?you want her all to yourself but you say you are not her boyfriend..but you want to see other women at the same time..the couple should both agree on the terms of the union,stick to it and you get only wat u give..dont say you want one thing and expect something else...if u give more,u get more..to whom much is given, much is expected ..if u ask me there's nutin like 'the one' anywhere. ..every human being has their individual demons and come with their own bullshit so it's just a #choice of whose shit you wana deal with..it's always a choice.
     Most People want #romance without being #vulnerable...if u wana know the truth u have to stand close to it and in the process could get burned or liberated..it's always a #risk you have to be willing to take...some people think not wearing the 'boyfriend' title takes alot of pressure off the dating game cos they feel 'irrational expectations' is what kills a relationship..expectations are inevitable not only in relationships but at work,home,schools etc and even in platonic friendships. .human beings do rely on each other at one time or the other. ...it's funny tho cos if u are an independent woman and outspoken, the narrowminded African man will go the Christian route and say you don't need a man and are not submissive...yet if u expect him to help you out with financial and emotional support he'll say you are clingy and dependent..hmmm so Wat do men really want?I admit that women are more emotional than men and tend to maximize everything cos we are wired to react to what we hear(and feel) whilst men are wired to react to what they see(physical creatures).men say women are crazy cos they are too #emotional..two totally opposite sides of the human species yet we are drawn to each other by nature to procreate and build a life together ...chemistry is a very powerful force but it still doesn't overide the different traits in both sexes...
      Choice,#compromise, #communication, #compatibility , #commitment and #consistency are not words to be taken lightly...#love is a verb and showing affection is in what you do rather than in what u say...a guy meets a girl and they exchange numbers..right off the bat he starts flooding her fon with memes and chain-messages and videos and audios and Christian material without even asking the things she likes or if she's even Christian or religious for that matter!what has one got to do with the other?what happened to proper #courtship?simple stuff like spending time together and talking to know the basics things about each other.saying what you feel and think from the heart in your own words rather than forwarding something someone wrote and which has been sent to a billion or people. ....if people did that no one would jump into the next level of dating cos then you'll know if you like them enough or not.You can then decide to remain friends..You can never know everything about someone but you can know the important bits if you do proper dating and the first step is to be #friends...and you should also know that dating is always about the other person(be it the man or woman),their feelings,etc ..be considerate of their views,principles,values,etc. .people have become lazy and complacent in the pursuit of romance..does romance still even exist?. What does that word mean in these times??
      Nowadays everybody knows everything, thanx to Google ..people don't 'dig' for anything anymore..You can't teach kids anything cos with the click of a 'button' they are able to access information their mind is not developed well enough to process and understand. .call me old-school but i believe the internet and social media in some way has taken all emotions out of human #interactions. .well everything in life has its pros and cons and it's about how u manage the two...#monogamy is unnatural but we have been 'asked' to 'make it work'....I call it the biggest set-up of the #human race...despite all I've said though I love the idea of #love..a good long ,warm ,cuddle from a clean-smelling ,bald,bearded, bear of a man beats any pleasure of life!...good food is also another!.....love life and be considerate with one another...#SteveHarvey said his dad told him he would mess up in life but he should acknowledge it and be nice about it..let's all do same...shalom....#soultosoul #gaylesgifts #gaylesgists #gaylesgold #Gaylesnotes #gaylesthoughts