dancing in the 'rain'

              I really miss my #childhood!..and that's so weird cos when I was a #child I couldn't wait to be a grown-up and do grown-up stuff...like when I was fifteen #and went to a club(Glenn's nite club to be precise!) with two grownups;the bouncer gave me a cursory glance and bounced me!..lol...wasn't funny back then though! ...it took me a coupla years to #recover from the shame before I went back there again!...even though I was 15 in O level form 5 (my  class mates were abt 22yrs old),my IQ was way up there(i was really a smart kid) yet physically I looked like 11 and coupled with my 'breastless' chest I don't blame the bouncer for denying me entry!. ..I thought I had arrived...I had on some #short,  long-sleeved denim dress against #black tights with some two-inched blocked-heeled pointed shoes that I'm sure Sir Gordon Guggisberg (forgot the spelling..he was one of the first slave traders that came to Ghana I think..that history was taught me decades ago!..) left behind after he got his slaves and left Ghana ! ...my sisters used to tease me to no end about those shoes!..the huge buckles on the #shoes were what set them off!...what was I thinking back then?!!!...come to think of it,I wasn't thinking!
        The #lessons of life are always learnt through #irony..I needed to be an adult and experience life with its ups and down to appreciate my childhood..my childhood was simple and hard sometimes but it was fulfilling cos the rewards matched the #effort. .the rewards of your input were guaranteed..there were no doubts...it's like when your parents warned you not to put your hand in fire or you'll get burned..you put your hand in fire and you really got burned and the scars were there as a reminder!...reminds me of the times we didn't have electricity at home..my mum couldn't afford #power for a long time so we used 'bobo'(local kerosene lamps made from tins) at night..the fire from the bobo blackened the part of the wall where we continually kept it to light [en] up the house and till this day I've always hated the #smell of kerosene...one time I overfilled the bobo with #kerosene and as a result when I lit the wick the fire lit up the spillage on the cover ..my reflex action was to pick up the burning bobo to do what,till today I can't rember..what I rember though is I have a big scar on my left hand to remind me of that incident(with time though the scar has faded,thanx to Palmers Cocoabutter cream which I've used for years and years!)...when I picked the bobo up, the hot kerosene poured on my #hand and burned me something bad !!!..I had huge blisters that stiffened up and cracked with time...chale!!!...I #look back on that day with mixed feelings but it the nostalgia i feel is undeniable!
       I rember i didn't have basic necessities like chalewote (plastic flipflops to my western peeps!) so I was barefoot most of the time and after I started  owning some I never went barefoot again...I actually cringe now whenever I have to step on the floor barefoot....#childhoodthings.....I'm someone who's always liked nice things from childhood till now..ALWAYS...so back then when there was not much money I found ways to compromise... Kantamanto was my second home!!...those people who sold the secondhand clothes owe me plenty for all the rags I bought from them!..whenever I was shopping there and I glimpsed a friend I'll hide,forgetting we were in the same boat!..it was embarrassing for me to think someone would know I bought and wore second-hand clothes!..it was crazy mehn!..we were young and still learning and growing so who cared if we wore rags!..but i did!..sigh!i think i was too much in a hurry to become a grown-up so i could paint my nails and wear high-heeled shoes(funny I'm a grown-up now and can't even walk well in heels..go figure!..lol) and order other kids around and drive a car and be married and have kids and be happy..that was my idea of adulthood..everything was nice and problem-free..I have long left that illusion behind me!..serious disillusionment is what happened to me when i became an adult!...these days though kantamanto items are even more expensive than boutique stuff...don't ask me how I know cos I've moved on from that chapter koraa....lol
          My childhood days were when u owned just one #pair of panties and that was that!...chale the undie became so wornout and threadbare from overwashing and over-usage and ofcos the band over-stretched...I rember one time I had a suitor at my house #and we were chatting on our porch..yes,those days dating started early on in our years...so we were standing having a convo, or rather,he was smoothtalking me and I was just pretending to listen!..suddenly I felt my loose undie about to slide down my legs so 'reflexively' I quickly lifted up my leg onto the #porch stoop and pretended to straighten my dress whiles trying to subtly knot the band to secure it..but I think the guy was sharper than i thought and caught on! ... the idiot had to go open his big mouth and say 'why,are your panties loose??!!'..aargh! !...I went crimson with embarrassment and anger and ofcos walked him out!...anytime I rember that incident I crack up...hahahahhahaha...I think I was thirteen or so..writing about it now i have this sheepish grin on my face with the memory of it...i wish i could do it all over again!..wear my rags and walk #barefoot to go buy my waakye in my favorite metalic bowl!..that bowl was a car part i am very sure!..we had a fitting shop in our back yard so it makes sense..it was made of stainless #steel and very heavy and it was mine!...everyone at home called it the 'heavy pan'......oh,i miss my heavy pan!
         As an adult you don't always get what you're 'promised'...the work you 'put it' doesn't always get you the deserved or promised outcome...in fact 'expectations' are seen in a 'derogatory' light...even when someone tells you they will treat you in a certain way, when you protest cos you feel shortchanged you'll be made to feel like you're not being #reasonable. ..you can't get away with being selfish as an adult....#people will dislike you if you don't treat them the way they feel they should be treated. .so much so that if you treat them in your own way,though positively,they won't notice it cos it's not what they want...being an #adult is so hard...you're solely #responsible for your upkeep..grooming,lifestyle etc ..we should try and empathize when dealing with other people..and society is not helping any cos it has its own ideas of how people should act at certain ages and whatnot..and when you don't #conform you're branded as 'tooknow'(where do u think i got my pen-name!!) or something crazy like that..you have to be married at a certain age..when you marry you should have kids..if it is just one kid they will ask you when are you 'dropping' the next one..if you are successful #woman you automatically slept your way to the top!..if you are a rich man you killed your mum for 'ritual' money!..if you got raped it was your fault cos you had provocative #clothes on or you visited the rapist knowing he was gona ask for #sex!.society is made up of people like you and me,no?..so why should it dictate to us on how to live our lives?...stay in your lane..do you,I'll do me....
        Even when I was dating way back in my #youth it was simple and fun...still had drama but it was worth the investment. ..the grievances were few and far between..the misgivings were almost non-existent cos the dynamics were 'consistent'.....my first #boyfriend would bring me kelewele (fried spicy plantain chunks to my abrofos.) on his visits...sometimes meat pie and country milk chocolate drink..fried yam and chofi (a Ghanaian delicacy:fried turkey-tail) plus shitor (black pepper sauce)..sometimes he would even bring me hausa koko (local Ghanaian spicy millet porridge ) and akara (fried bean cakes)...my mouth still salivates anytime i rember those times..what i won't give for someone to bring me some!!..not that I can't afford it but just for the simple #fact that he thought about me and wanted to do something nice for me..I miss that alot... I really do...these days you meet a guy,he takes your number and the next thing is he is asking for nude photos of you or something crass like that!..or bombarding your phone with memes of religious stuff and videos of crap that does not #mean shit to you!..#make 'conversation' daaaaamnnniiittt!!..ask about her interests..her views..tell her about yourself..your plans...get to know each other a little before getting seriously involved..#people meet today knorr then dey wan marry!..where is the fire?!!!!..'my mum says i should get married!'...'I am getting old'...'all my mates are getting married!'...these and more are some of the unbelievable reasons people have for hitching up!...chillax!..there is no rush!
         What I also miss is sitting in a suitor's #car outside and just listening to music and talking about any and everything for hours on end..or even just sitting on a bench and watching people walk up and down going about their daily activities.. people really cared back then..they made and effort to show it whichever way they could....they communicated....which reminds me of another childhood memory..there used to be a truck that used to pass by our house every working #day those days:it was full of workers on their way home from work and anytime they got to where we were sitting they would throw gravel at us ...i think that were construction workers..why they threw the stones I'll never know ..I guess it was their way of communicating some sort of greeting..I never knew I'll say this,but I miss it!....every #moment in our lives however insignificant or otherwise should be cherished cos every incident plays an important part in putting together the pieces of the puzzle called life...thanx for reading...#shalom  #gaylesgifts

stripped

        I'm a #woman..I love being a woman. .I love my body parts...I love having #breasts..I love how they bounce up and down when I run or jump..I love that I have a 'harness' for them..we call them #brassieres.I love #beautiful lingerie .i like how it feels on my skin...i love how a #good brassiere cups my breasts and keeps it secure to my chest..so i get cheesed off when a guy just grabs at  my  boobs just cos it's on 'display' for all to see...it is a woman's #pride and you need permission from her to touch them...one riffraff grabbed my boob once when I was younger..I threw a stone at him!..it was a reflex action but the right one!..I was so mad!..I felt violated!..imagine if i grab at the #penis of just any stranger i see..think about it!..looks stupid,right?..i rest my case.
          Women tend to 'outwear' their bras..or should i say 'overwear' them..I've seen,with my #own eyes a bra that was so overstretched  and knotted I almost mistook them for a fishing #net..right there and  then I was so embarrassed to call myself a woman!..ebei!!.one bra i saw had the underwiring sticking out and,#brace yourself,it was rusted !!!aargh! !.you'll see women in town with their bra straps showing from under their clothes and they it is filthy!!..you can tell it was supposed to be #white but it looks black..we #sweat under our boobs so don't wear your bra for 1000yrs before washing..there's nuting worse than the smell of a damp sweaty bra!!*shudder!!***.
        Some women #wear bras that dont fit well..either it is undersized,where you'll see her boobs squashed and piled on top of the bra  cups like fufu in an asanka (traditional earthenware bowl to my abrofo ppl) waiting for the abenkwan (palmnut soup) to be poured on it and devoured!...or it is oversized and  her boobs will just be swimming in the bra cups like wet old #socks,esp when 'gravity' has not been kind to them..our boobs won't be perky for ever..I'll tell you that for free..when we are young, bras are a fashion thingy and when #old age sets in they a 'cosmetic' necessity..we don't want our boobs to lose its firmness but it is inevitable..some women with smaller boobs wear padded bras to give them some confidence. .that's when a guy would say he felt cheated when he unveiled them in the sexual 'throes' of lovemaking!..he was expecting big boobs #and what he got were 'friedeggs' or just nipples...
         Most women,including myself are #insecure about one or some,or all  parts of their body..'i wish i had bigger boobs'..'i wish i had a bigger butt'..'i wish my legs were bigger'..'i wish my thighs were smaller'...and the list goes on and on and on..lots of men have told me they don't care too much about the woman's looks like we do..he's not gonna fall for you based on how #expensive your weave looks or how long your artificial nails are..or how much make-up you have got on.some women pile up so #much crap on their face you will have to scrape it off with a shovel!..aahba!..women, let us keep it simple and #natural as much as possible..
      I love that i have a sexy waist..that is why i love to 'enhance' them with African beads.. ..there is nothing sexier than a woman's waist adorned with beautiful colorful beads.. i like when i see the beads peak its 'head' above the edge of a woman's #panties  and skirt or trouser band when she bends to pick up something...beads on the waist serves a lot of purposes..it makes the woman feel sexy and African..it serves as a weight watcher 'device';when you are putting on #weight it will get tighter..some men also use it as their reins when riding into eternity!..so women you gotta make sure your beads got strong strings cos your man can break them when humping away like some deranged bull!
        I love that i have hips..I love beautiful drawers..sexy durable knickers ..i usually have an amount,lets say 20pairs,at a time..i wear them for awhile and change them according to the condition. .dont wear undies till you get your 'money' out of it..i have sexy drawers for them days..*wink wink*..i got drawers for periods (those are a mixture of sexy,granny panties,'dental floss', to choose from)..the 'idoncare' drawers i wear when i'm by myself..those ones are the huge tents,a lil tear-and-wear relationship going on,frays and all...every woman's got one of those! ..i got a couple i think!.and then there's the commado days! ...the days we let everything hang!..naked  u came and naked you'll  go!..lol..you best believe that!...period panties should be dark-colored ones(black,navy blue,brown,etc) cos when there's a stain it wouldn't be too obvious even after you wash them..bright colored panties are hard to take care of during that time of the month..soak your panties awhile with detergent, wash them properly and hang them out to dry in the sun...the hot sun kills all the bacteria accumulated from sitting on toilet seats....please please please don't keep discolored panties amongst your things..it is DISGUSTING.....throw them away!!
              I cant talk about panties and not talk about keeping the vagina neat and clean..the vagina doesn't smell like roses but it certainly doesn't smell like rotten eggs either..so lets stop subjecting our men to those atrociously foul smells..its become too embarrassing for me to be hearing #that all the time from men...there are perfectly safe soap-free vaginal wash[es] on the market..spend extra time on all parts of the vagina..the lips,the pubes...your inner thighs...
        I love that I have beautiful feet and legs...I have never had a #pedicure. .well not a professional one..but then there's so many ways of killing a cat..I give myself a home pedicure maybe once in a month. .I soak my feet in warm soapy water..and scrub with a pumice..scrub the heels,ankles,between the toes, ..I get rid of all the calluses. ..leaving my feet soft to the touch...then i rinse the #soap of with warm water,pat them dry with a towel and rub on pormade...keep the nails short and filed...paint them if you want. .I paint mine myself...and I'm good to go!
       I love that i have supple,smooth AFRICAN #skin..i use alata saminaa (black locally made soap from plantain peels and other natural ingredients) for bathing..i use cocoa butter cream on my body after every bath.. i have used these items for years and years..that is why my skin remains firm and succulent!..I am proud of my body and so I take care of it the best way i can.
      ....the woman's body is a beautiful thing to behold...I admire a #woman the way a man does...though mine is from a purely non-sexual point...it's just appreciating nature and its fascinating hold on me..the vagina is an enigma..physically and figuratively..it's appearance is intriguing even to me,a woman...it looks foreboding and ominous...portentous ...physically it can't be described as beautiful. .but it can give lots of sexual pleasure to herself and to the opposite #sex...it causes lots of 'havoc' to mankind most times..like everything else it has got its pros and cons...generally it gives great pleasure so let us ENJOY AWAY!....thanx for reading...shalom  #gaylesgifts